Many years ago, when my brother was looking at colleges, my uncle came with us to Holy Cross (his alma mater) and we took in a football game. This, of course, included some tail-gating, pre-and post-game, and my uncle got quite sloshed, so much so that my brother's friend drove us home. Not all relevant information, but u2's "I Still Haven't Found What I'm Looking For," came on the radio during the ride home, and my uncle, in his haze, claimed this was "the theme song for half the population of the United States." I love drunk people.
Years later, I wonder if he was actually correct. It was obviously true for him, since he divorced my aunt several years ago. I certainly haven't found what I'm looking for, in the sense that I don't know what I'm looking for and in the sense that I haven't found much of anything at all, really. I don't think I'm alone, really.
Years ago, I vowed never to try Internet Dating. I have long since shattered that vow, so much so that a friend of mine recently stated that he was jealous of the fact that I go on so many dates. Let me stress that I go on a lot of first dates, and rarely go on a second one. I have no explanation as to why this is, except that these women still haven't found what they were looking for. I don't know what that is, and I wonder if they do. I just know it wasn't me.
I do feel that women who date on the internet (and I'm talking full-bore, like a profile on a dating site) tend to have a clearer list of things they want, and probably can afford to be more selective because I think they get more responses than men. I have actually stopped sending e-mails out because I rarely got a response, and I am assuming that it was because these women either chickened out of the whole thing, or just got more than enough e-mails and got tired of it all. But I truly believe that they are more selective in this forum. In fact, I feel that one girl (who contacted me) saw my profile and was fine with it, but upon learning my real name, she did some stalking and saw on facebook that I had shaved my head, and quickly cancelled our date (literally hours before we were to meet.) Now, several women have told me that hair is not an issue for them, but I think in the world of Internet Dating, when women probably have another suitor in line, hair is an issue, and you really don't need to date a bald guy. So, despite what people say about personality being important in relationships and all that, in Internet Dating, looks win out. I am not above this, by the way. That's why I haven't dated anyone who weighs more than me.
One of the other problems I have encountered is the way the internet allows people to dishonest, and back out of dates with much less mess than they would if they actually knew a person. A quick text saying you have to pick someone up at the airport. An e-mail saying that you're seeing someone when you're obviously not. One girl told me that she was sick, then got sicker, and finally something hit her in the head and she thought she had a concussion. We have yet to meet, although she did send me very provocative pictures of herself, so pardon me for getting the wrong idea.
None of this, of course, helps me figure out what I'm looking for, other than honesty. My hope is that I'll know it when I see it, but because life sucks, she probably won't actually call me back when I do find her. And the reason may be because I got a haircut. I know that's simplifying things a little, but when you are in the business of Dating by Trading Card, that's the way it goes.
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